Ann struggled with anxiety, acute asthma and a frequent sense of gloom. Traditional therapy and medication had helped her in many areas of her life, but neither had allayed these symptoms for long.

Though the youngest of three, Ann felt responsible for everyone in her family and overwhelmed by guilt because she felt she wasn't fulfilling her role in the family as well as she "should": Her father had not been able to bond with his eldest son and out of love for her father, Ann had unconsciously replaced her brother in that position. Unfortunately for Ann this misplacement had resulted in that sense of responsibility and also in a minimizing of her true female strength.

Several early physical traumas also contributed to her suffering. Therefore, the next six sessions were focused on using Somatic Experiencing (SE) to help Ann with the fear frozen in her nervous system. This initial work also helped her find her center and strength more easily in preparation for the work with generational trauma that seemed essential.

Turning our attention now to the generational trauma I set up two mats on the floor, side by side, and about seven feet in front of her. The mat on the right represented that part of her that still saw the beauty of life. I asked her about her most recent memory of that feeling, and she said, "Standing on my porch a few days ago and really enjoying the freshness of the breeze." As she remembered this moment she took a deep releasing breath.

Then on the left I placed a mat representing what she called the "sucking dark vortex." As she described this a heaviness descended over her. I then placed a line about three feet in front of her representing a "line of decision". She could step in either direction: to the breeze or the vortex. I then asked Ann to just begin to be aware of whatever sensations she noticed in her body as she stood facing the decision line and the two mats beyond the line.

She quickly said she knew that she wanted to go toward "the breeze" but her legs felt paralyzed. I noticed that she was swaying in a disoriented way and that energetically she appeared to have no sense of anyone behind her. It was if she was scrambling on her own, trying to catapult herself toward the good feelings and, of course, unable to do so without any sense of life force to carry her. She said, "I want to fly toward the joy, but I can't get off the ground."

I then put some cut outs of footprints on the floor behind Ann. These are sometimes used to represent relevant people in constellations: the footprints immediately behind Ann represented her mother and the others five or six generations of mothers and daughters each behind the other. I said to her, "Can you imagine your mother and generations of your mother's female lineage behind you in support of you?" She immediately started to fall slightly forward, and said she felt "pushed" by them. I asked her to take her time and when she was ready, to turn and face the virtual line of women behind her. When she did she immediately laughed with delight said they were calling out, "Go. Don't worry, just go!" However, almost immediately she became caught again in the interpretation that their joyful encouragement was aggression.

I asked her now if she could turn to face the line of women's footprints behind her, and if I could step in a few feet in front of her as one of these women. With some reluctance she agreed, and I noticed her body begin to freeze as I took a place about five feet away from her. I then moved further away, and she began to relax. As a representative in her lineage I immediately noticed that I felt very calm and strong with a clear sense of quiet support for my great-great granddaughter. I was pleased that life went on. I told her so, and we stood quietly and comfortably in this way for some time.

She said she was surprised that she felt calmer, but then added, "I'm still sure everyone is pushing me." After a time, still representing a woman in her lineage, I asked her to turn around with the line of women again behind her. Now behind her I then asked, "Can I slowly step toward you a few inches, and is it OK with you for me to gently put my hand on your back?" Without hesitation this time, she said, "Yes."

Given her experience of being pushed, her body was understandably cautious as she tentatively experimented with letting herself lean back on the hand at her back.

As she allowed herself to physically and emotionally experience a new and deeper reality, the story she had been carrying most of her life was softening: clearly Ann had taken a step closer toward "the breeze". She had a beginning sense in her body that she could be supported by the force behind her rather than forced forward by it, alone and unsupported. With this new felt understanding, she would be able to move ahead with less guilt and anxiety and more enjoyment of being a strong woman.